Lesson 4: "T" for Thinking Strategically - Healing through Hope and Humor Free Course

Speaker A: 00:00:00

Cancer can mess with your mind, my friend, and send you into a doom spiral.

What if you had some ways to reset your mind set so your mind has more of a new car smell rather than thinking that stinking like dirty socks left in the bottom of the hamper for a few weeks. Want to learn more? Listen on my friend. Listen on. Welcome my friend, to the Cancer and Comedy Show. My name is Dr.

Brad Miller and I had something happen to me that I just had to laugh to keep from crying. A month or so after I retired from 43 years of ministry, my wife and I had big plans to travel and do great other things.

I was diagnosed with cancer and that kind of rocked my world. And in order to keep from dissolving into tears, I decided to turn them into a process of connecting hope with humor and to affect healing.

I call that now what we're doing here, the Cancer and Comedy show and I thank you for joining me. So the comedy show.

The show is one thing and it's also a part of what I like to do in this episode is to share with you a course that I've put together. It's a free course.

This here is a kind of a preview the last few episodes in this episode, five episodes here that are all about this free course which is called the the Healing with hope and humor free course. It'll be available on our website, cancer and comedy.com as well.

But it's also right here in the podcast and on our first episode, first episode, first part of this, the day one of a five day series we taught, we introduced you to the ACTS plan.

The ACTS plan which, which is the process I use to help us connect the drama of cancer with healing through hope and humor and the process and why we need it and what are the impacts of connecting hope and humor even with a dreaded disease like cancer. And the second day, the day two was the A and the word ax was to take action and the change attitude.

And day three, which was the C in the word acts was to connect with a higher power and to connect with other people as a part of the healing process. And today is day four of the process. The letter T in the word ACTS stands for thinking.

And the title of today's episode is thinking like a new car over stinking thinking like old dirty socks. That just means we got to change the way we think and it makes all the world's difference in how we have new ideas and new disciplines to do things.

Heard about one, a friend of mine who invented an air freshener that you could control with your mind. And if you think about it, an air freshener to control your mind. It just makes sense. S C A and S C E N T S It makes sense. That's a bad one.

I know some of these just make you groan, don't they? But that's part of what I do.

I like to tell some jokes, dad humor and tell some funny antidotes and that kind of stuff to kind of give us a little brighter outlook on things and to see how humor can connect with, with healing. That's part of what we do here. We have our lesson that we're going to teach.

Another part of what we do is the the lesson and is the a faith it or break it segment which is where I teach a biblical lesson or a faith based lesson because I'm such a big believer that you really can't heal without having an aspect of faith in your life.

And then we also will have an opportunity for our lifter upper segment which is where somebody calls in and is a part of what we are all about and they share a story where something good happened to them or something made them smile or lifted up their spirits during their cancer journey. It's great because you know you can get, you can get kind of stuck if you don't watch out.

You know, I'm a great, I'm a gigantic Beatles fan and one of the greatest songs of the Beatles ever had was Yesterday. Anybody else remember the song Yesterday?

You know, Paul McCartney sang it and he said yesterday all my troubles seem so far away now it looks as though they're here to stay Here to stay oh, I believe in Yesterday that's a story. It's a great song but it's also a story there about somebody kind of getting stuck in their troubles.

And we're talking here about changing your thinking to get out of your troubles and to move on. That's what we're here about on cancer and comedy.

Do want to announce to you this episode is brought to you by the grand opening of the cancer and comedy show the live show.

,: 2023

Great, great, great comedian who is also a cancer survivor in his own right and he'll be here to headline our live show in the community where, where we live at, where I'm based out of. And it also will be live streamed on Facebook and YouTube. YouTube and all the links will be for you there.

But this is the, this is who is bringing you. This is the grand opening of the cancer and comedy show. Right now it's time to get into some of our content.

We're going to teach a little bit about moving from stinkin thinkin like old dirty socks to new car smell thinking here on cancer and comedy. Hello again, my friend Dr.

Brad Miller with you here on the next installment, the fourth day of our course, the HHH course, which stands for healing with hope and humor. This is the preview course. You can find the the complete course of the free course at our website cancerandcomedy.com free.

Today we're talking about the T in the word Acts. The T stands for thinking just to review.

On day one, we talked about the ACTS plan and the connection between humor and healing and hope and developing a process and developing, starting to develop a credo in your life which your statement of beliefs. So that was day one. Day two we talked about the A for taking action. And in day three we talked about the C which is connecting with God and others.

Today it's thinking with new disciplines, thinking.

Speaker B: 00:07:44

In a new way.

Speaker A: 00:07:46

I have a doctoral degree in transformational leadership which has to do with taking old ways of thinking and doing things, old disciplines transforming to something new that's more effective and more helpful for an organization or an individual to meet their goals. That means you got to change your thinking.

I like to kind of term it like you need to think about kind of new car smell, thinking things are new and fresh rather than old stinky socks thinking you need to think in new ways, new disciplines. Because sometimes it's our old habits, our old disciplines that got us in trouble at times and we can stay stuck there.

And if you want to have healing and if you want to do it with hopefulness and with humor, it means new thinking as well. So I'm going to give you a few tips here, a few things that you can chew on, just a little bit of ways that you might enact kind of cognitively.

This is the kind of the brain portion of our course, the thinking part of our course about how you can make some changes in your life to be more effective in this way. New habits, new practices to begin to cope with your cancer. Diagnosis number one is emotional expression.

This means things like journaling or doing art or music or somehow another expressing your feelings and emotions. It might be singing, it might be podcasting or doing YouTube videos, but it provide an outlet for your expression.

You know, it's amazing to me that, that some people really take up when they have cancer or some other profound thing they take up. You know, they write poetry or they. They write a book, or they start.

Pick up a guitar for the first time in many years, or do music or start singing in a choir or getting into a band. They do something different to express themselves. And they often find a release in that which is helpful.

And an emotional release and emotional expression is a form of joy. It's a form of self satisfaction that is so important here. And that's part of the humor.

Part of this, you know, kind of the comedy part is doing things that bring joy. It's cheerful. It's a cheerful thing to do. So I encourage you to somehow another find some new way to express yourself emotionally.

You might just start with journaling, writing down your thoughts in a notebook, or there's online tools as well. That's one of the things that I do. Number two is seeking support.

This is where you actually intentionally open up conversations with other people in your life. Little things, things that go beyond the, you know, hey, how you doing? And how's the kids? And how's the family and the spouse and that kind of thing.

But open up intimate conversations with some loved ones or with medical professionals or with friends. And sometimes you might want to get into a support group.

You know, there are cancer support groups that are part of medical facilities, sometimes part of churches or other groups, community groups that you might want to be a part of. The idea is you got to seek it out, you got to want it.

One of the things that I did is my particular cancer situation is I had a friend or two who had the same type of cancer that I had, and I sought them out. And we had some pretty deep conversations about the cancer situation that I had. And it was a good thing.

And now I have a different level of relationship with those friends that goes beyond some of the things we used to talk about to a deeper level of personal connection. But the idea here is you got to seek it. You can't do this on your own. I really believe that.

And you're going to seek out support if you want to seek out something beyond that. We're developing a community here at cancer and comedy.

Reach out to us through the website cancerincomedy.com or you can always email me directly@bradancerandcomedy.com and we'll get you started in this whole process. So emotional expressions, number one, seeking support is number two. Number three, is holistic wellness health. This has to do with the full body.

And this means your healthy eating practices, exercise, relaxation, breathing techniques, physically working out are all integrated with your emotional health. And so that's why we call it a holistic approach.

Your cancer situation is served when you eat right, when you exercise, when you have breathing techniques, it is served by that. And therefore you also are put in a better mood and a better place. And it's a helpful thing to do.

But a lot of times it means changing our thinking from where we are at and putting it into practice. Okay, so there's that, those are the, some of the things happen in that regard. A fourth thing is the mind body practices.

This is where you even go take this physical aspect a little bit farther.

These are things like practices like yoga and meditation, tai chi, there's other ones as well, martial arts, things that purposely integrate the mind and body.

I know a couple of folks who really, really had some really good results when they took their bad situation and they leveraged it into some form form of martial art which really, it's really incorporated this mind body practices into their life. Reduces stress, it promotes healing.

It's generally just a good thing to do because we're all one person and we all these various aspects and they are integrated. Okay, so number one was emotional expression. Number two, seeking support. Number three, holistic wellness for mind body practices.

Our fifth, our fifth one, our final one is to purposely limit the stressors in your life. This is sometimes easier said than done, but you got to be mindful of that.

So identify and minimize those stresses in your environment and go for calm and a peaceful atmosphere for recovery. That is going to mean different things for different people. Sometimes that means to get away from certain people who cause you stress.

You know, in your life, maybe in a workplace situation you need to avoid a certain person. That's okay in this case. Maybe there are certain aspects of your environment. Maybe there is a noise that that is really just bothers you a lot.

Maybe it's something, you know, some sort of noise in your house or something like that. There's all kinds of things that can cause stress. Let me tell you one that I bet you you can limit stress right now. Don't watch the news so much.

If you watch tv, don't watch the news so much. What's things that are positive and uplifting. Watch comedy movies and TV shows and that kind of thing.

Not all the stressful things about the news that'll help you a little bit. Also take some time just to turn off the electronics. Turn off your phone and your computer. Don't check the email so much. Just relax, relax.

Limit the stressors in your life. So we got emotional expression seeking support. Holistic wellness. The mind body practices eliminating stressors. Let me give you a bonus one here.

Find creative outlets. These are hobbies basically.

Okay, the hobbies I'm talking about, whatever it is, it kind of is, is in relationship to the number one emotional expression. But you know what? My hobby, one of my hobbies is podcasting. I love it. I love talking to microphone and sharing myself with other people.

But I'm also interested in some of the electronic parts of that and some of the tech parts of that is a little bit of my hobby might be building model airplanes. I like to fly kite. I like to fly a kite with my grandchildren. It could be other stuff.

It can be doing crafts, it could be playing music, it can be all kinds of things like this.

Find a hobby as a creative outlift and may sometimes you can get lost in that stuff and you find joy and enjoy out of the situation you find yourself in. I like to call it turn in the grim into a grin. And you got to be very intentional about doing just that. So let me just encourage you in that regard.

So we're talking here about how you can cope with cancer and ultimately take all these things and we're going to build the cancer coping credo. Your credo is your statement of belief. It's your written thing that you're going to put together. It's what we do at the HHH free course about.

The HHH is for help for healing through hope and humor. But you're going to come out of this course with a written statement that is going to serve you.

That's going to be the outcome and is what what we're talking about here. So in our final episode, come in.

Our final episode in this five day series coming up next time we're gonna I'm going to share with you my credo and I hope that you'll work on yours. For now, your homework is simply this. What is your change of mind or your new thinking way that you're going to do this?

What's something you're going to do for for yourself? What's your practice? Journaling, music, podcasting, painting, writing, building wild airplanes. What is it?

Choose something that kind of breaks a pattern for you that you can think differently.

But to find out more about what this course is all about, please go over to cancerandcomedy.com free and you can find out more about the free course, the HHH course on healing, hope and humor.

Speaker C: 00:18:03

Now let's lighten things up just a little bit by having our cancer and comedy segment. Dr. Brad's bad joke of the day.

Speaker A: 00:18:13

Here's a great story about optimistic thinking. Little boy, about 8 years old, was super excited about Christmas. And all he wanted for Christmas was a pony. He really, really, really wanted a pony.

And he was bugging his parents day and night and day and night about, oh, mom and dad, I want a pony, I want a pony, I want.

Speaker B: 00:18:41

A pony so bad.

Speaker A: 00:18:42

And you know, he would, I want to tell someone, I want to tell everybody, I want a pony. And he just bugged him so much about a pony.

Speaker B: 00:18:50

His parents said to him, you know.

Speaker A: 00:18:52

Son, I just don't think that's going to happen. Of course, his parents didn't think they had the money or the wherewithal to have a pony. But Christmas rolled around.

The little boy was convinced that he was going to have a pony at Christmas. Well, the parents knew they couldn't do a pony and they were getting a little put out with the son.

So they managed to do kind of play a mean trick on him. They, they said, I'm going to teach this kiddo a lesson that you just can't always get what you want at life, even at Christmas.

And so they had a neighbor, had a horse, and they got a big pile of horse manure and they put this present, a box, you know, know, full of horse manure as a present under the tree for him. That's pretty rotten trick, don't you think?

Well, Christmas morning came around and little boy tore into the present and he opened the box and he found this big pile of horse manure under the tree instead of any other presence. And yet the little boy was not discouraged. And he began to jump into and dive in, into that horse manure.

And, and he was going all through it and he was a gigantic mess because he was optimistic in every way. And his parents, go, go, man. What are you doing? You're shoveling through this manure. And he what are you doing?

And he finally exclaims, I know with all this manure, there's gotta be a pony in there somewhere.

Speaker C: 00:20:29

Well, now it's time to shift gears a bit for Dr. Brad's faith it or Break it segment.

Speaker B: 00:20:38

On our Faith it or Break it segment.

Let's talk about thinking in a new way and the impact and the influence and the power of new thought can have in the Bible, in the New Testament, there was a Guy named Paul. He was called an apostle because he was a follower of Jesus and he wanted to extend the message.

And he was well known for changing the thinking of a lot of people. There's a lot we could say about this, but one of the things that Paul said is he wrote a letter to some church folks in a place called Philippi.

And it's the book of Philippians 4, verse 8. It goes like this where it talks about thinking. He says, finally, brothers and sisters, he's addressing the people in the church.

Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, things, think about such things. So he's calling upon people to think in a new way. When you do that, you go from average to extraordinary in your cancer journey.

You don't want to be dissolved into the way things have always been. You want to think extraordinary. You want to think about what can be.

It's a choice between the grim and the grin, between decline and a focus on what is good and noble and lovely and thriving. Had a real change of thinking for me a number of years ago.

In the year: 1990

Petersburg, what used to be known as Leningrad in the ussr, as it was known then, we had to take a train from Helsinki, Finland, into the Soviet Union.

And among the many things we took with us in this train, the train trip that we took, everybody had one piece of luggage and we were smuggling in Bibles, Russian language and English language, to share with the people there. Now, you were allowed to have one Bible, but it was against the law in the Soviet Union to have more than one Bible. We had about 300 Bibles.

There were divided among three, 30 people. You could. You do the math. We each had 10 plus Bibles in our, in our luggage. And we were determined that we were going to smuggle them in.

Jotter Zhivago movie from the: 1960

It was these giant iron doors.

Speaker A: 00:23:57

It.

Speaker B: 00:23:58

It Was snowing. It was clickety clack on the train tracks. And we stopped at the train station at the border between Finland and the Soviet Union.

When the Russian soldiers that we could see them gathering outside boarded the train with their, the Kalashikov machine guns and full, full armament came into the train to search everybody on the train, that's when it got real. That's when you start to think, you really think about what that could be. Then my thoughts went all kinds of places. What's going to happen to, to me?

Speaker A: 00:24:33

I had a.

Speaker B: 00:24:33

What's going to happen to my family if I get thrown in a Soviet jail? I was also thinking, moreover about, you know, all these Bibles we had there. Would they just be confiscated, would be, be in trouble?

What if these teenagers we were with and I was responsible for them, if they somehow got separated, what was I going to tell their parents? Lots of crazy thoughts went through my mind. Then suddenly the door, this giant iron door open, slammed open.

And this two of these young Soviet soldiers came in about the same age as the young men who were in my compartment with me. The guys with me were 15 and 16. And these guys were no, the soldiers were no more than 18.

And they came in and looked around, they opened one piece of luggage, they saw the Bibles there and they just shut it and left. Not much happened really, other than scaring us to death. But here's what I thought about.

I thought about how those young Soviet soldiers were not much different than the young people I was with there. They were just trying to get by day to day and they needed the word of God.

And later on I thought about how important it would be for us to share the word of God, the Bible to the people we were going to. And we were able to share these in the churches and the schools we went to.

And every time it was a magical moment when you saw a 16 year old teenager, American teenager, give it to a person in Russia.

I remember one occasion when this young woman from Dayton, Ohio gave a Bible to what was called a babushka, which is an older woman who wore scarves and drab clothing. She gave this Russian language Bible to a babushka.

And this woman exploded in tears and emotion that you could just tell had been built, built up all her life. And we learned from a translator that she had never owned a Bible in all her 75 years. And she was so happy and so thankful. Now here's the point.

What if we had not thought about taking the risk of doing what needed to be done to share Those bibles with those folks.

If we've been stuck in our stinking thinking about what a man, what woulda, shoulda, coulda might have been, but we thought about what could be, and we did. Took a risk to be sure, but everybody who was on that train, those young people, myself, were touched by the moment and changed.

We were transformed by something lovely and admirable and excellent and praiseworthy. It was a good thing. It was because we shifted our thinking from what was, what might have been to what could be and what the opportunity afforded us.

New thinking matters. It is impactful. It is influential, not only on yourself in your cancer journey, but on other people, too.

You are an example to them through your thoughts. And therefore the actions that come out of your thoughts. Don't be stuck in your old ways. Take a bit of a risk. Take a bit of a risk.

That starts with new thinking. Whatever you do, think on these things. Think on what is excellent and praiseworthy in cancer.

Do I not want to buy what has been, what could have been, but what can be? Think about having faith instead of being broken.

Speaker A: 00:27:57

That's faith it or break it.

Speaker C: 00:28:02

It's now time for our cancer and comedy featured segment as we hear from our lifter upper listener segment.

You can be on cancer and comedy as a lifter upper yourself with your uplifting story about your cancer journey by going to voicemail.cancerandcomedy.com.

Speaker B: 00:28:27

Our Cancer Lifter upper listener for this segment is David, whose sister was diagnosed with cancer. And unfortunately, her demise was quick. And just seven or eight months later, she passed away.

This is a very uplifting story about a relationship between a brother and a sister that changed for the better in the course of dealing with cancer.

Speaker D: 00:28:53

So, yeah, so she lived in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and that's where we spent our teenage years. And. And one of the things that you do in Myrtle beach is you go cruise the boulevard when you're a teenager. So you kind of go out and there.

There are some. Some people that, that have all souped up, sports cars or whatever.

And then, you know, so that was kind of the thing that we did back in our teenage years. So I had made from. From my hometown, Probably I think 22 trips to Myrtle beach because there literally was, you know, I have a brother and then.

And then her son, you know, is 19, so needed a lot of help. So I put life on hold for that year, which was tough, and I made that trip a lot.

And one of the nights that her son actually went to work, you know, when I was down there. That would be kind of his key. Like, look, you can go to work, you know, go get out. Just, you know, have a, quote, normal life for a night or two.

So my sister and I, we went to this little park that was, you know, I don't know, maybe a tenth of a mile circle. And we. We would walk around the circle, and it was, you know, just a nice, wooded little park across the street from the beach. And.

And that was a little bit of exercise. But then one night we. We went. We cruised the boulevard. So we took my car and. And there'd be no way to explain how bad my sister looked at this point.

Just, you know, a big scar on her face and just, you know, like, if you were. Would have seen her just not knowing her, you would have almost been horrified. So, you know, I was like, hey, let.

Speaker B: 00:30:19

Let's.

Speaker D: 00:30:19

Let's go cruise the boulevard. And so we drove down the boulevard and it's this huge Ferris wheel and there's, you know, cars and music and, you know, and. And she.

Her vision was very impaired from the Strokes and everything, but she knew we were there. And that was, you know, that was the time that I know that I made peace. And. And as human beings, I think it's.

I don't know how to say it the right way, but there are. There are things that maybe our family legitimately did us wrong.

But of course there are, you know, ways that I legitimately, you know, did her wrong or. Or she would have a legitimate, you know, beef with me and vice versa. But, you know, that was kind of the moment where it's like, you know what?

We're just. We're brother and sister.

Speaker B: 00:31:02

We.

Speaker D: 00:31:03

We, you know, for lack of a better term, we both suck as human beings in some ways, you know, and we both.

Speaker A: 00:31:08

You're having a good. You're having a good moment, right?

Speaker B: 00:31:10

You're having a good.

Speaker D: 00:31:11

Had that moment. And that was kind of the forgiveness moment.

And I don't want to say forgive because there was nothing really to forgive other than just some, you know, just some. Some sibling stuff. But that was a moment where I was like, you know what? We're just. Everything is. Is okay. It's. It's all better. It's all okay.

I knew whether it was going to be a week or month, she was not going to be around much longer.

Speaker B: 00:31:31

That's our listener, lifter, upper listener, David Chudyk. You can hear more about David Chudyk and how he was able to be helpful in a very pragmatic matter to his sister and to her son, his nephew.

In an upcoming interview we have with David here on Cancer and Comedy.

Don't forget you can be a part of the program here at Cancer and Comedy by going to our voicemail, voicemail.cancerandcomedy.com that's how you can find out more about how you can become one of our lifter upper listener contributors. Hey my friend, it is about time for us to close the curtain on this episode, this preview episode of the Cancer and Comedy Show.

It has been so good for us.

Speaker A: 00:32:29

To be together, hasn't it?

Speaker B: 00:32:30

And you can look forward us to us being together again next week. So make sure you connect up with us that way.

And don't forget, mark your calendars that the grand opening of the Cancer and Comedy show is coming up before you know it. It's a live as in live and in person clean comedy cancer benefit show.

,: 2023

Now, if you can't make it in person, the good news is that it's going to be live streamed on our cancer and comedy YouTube channel and on our Cancer and Comedy Facebook page so you can check those out. We'll put links to that in our episode notes. But here's why you want to be there either live and in person or live streaming.

Our headliner is a hilarious clean comedian by the name of Rick Roberts. You want to look him up, you look up some of his videos. He has performed on national television.

He's performed all over the country to sold out venues and corporate events and.

Speaker A: 00:34:01

All kinds of things.

Speaker B: 00:34:02

He is incredible.

Speaker A: 00:34:05

You want to check him out, he's.

Speaker B: 00:34:06

Going to be with us. We'll have some other special guests with us and some other opportunities to have some fun at this Clean Comedy live.

Speaker A: 00:34:14

Event and live and in person.

Speaker B: 00:34:16

But you want to check that out and be a part of the grand opening of the Clean Comedy Show.

Speaker A: 00:34:22

You don't want to miss that and.

Speaker B: 00:34:24

Help us pass the word about that that we can raise some great funds and other things that we can do.

Speaker A: 00:34:32

To support cancer research. So don't miss it. That's for more information about this and.

Speaker B: 00:34:41

Get all the details. Here's where you want to go. So Write this down.

Speaker A: 00:34:45

Cancerandcomedy.com events cancerandcomedy.com events.

Speaker B: 00:34:55

That's where you're going to find out about Rick Roberts, about the venue we're going to be at and about a little bit more about me and about.

Speaker A: 00:35:01

The things that are happening at our Clean Comedy cancer benefit show November 4.

Speaker B: 00:35:09

2023 in suburban Indianapolis, Indiana and online live streaming on Facebook and on YouTube.

Speaker A: 00:35:19

Here's what else you can do.

Speaker B: 00:35:21

If you really have benefited from what.

Speaker A: 00:35:23

You'Ve heard here today on the Cancer and Comedy show and the course that.

Speaker B: 00:35:28

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Speaker A: 00:35:42

And that's how you can follow or subscribe to the show.

Speaker B: 00:35:46

It really, it really helps us. It helps us to help you and so many cancer victims who are stuck in a grim place and they need a little grin in their life.

They need something to cheer them up. Because when you follow us, when you follow the cancer and comedy show and rate and review the cancer and comedy show, you do just that.

You help us to help others.

Speaker A: 00:36:15

To turn the grim into a grin.

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Speaker A: 00:36:26

For you iPhone people, there's also a.

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Speaker A: 00:36:39

There's no excuses. Go to cancerandcomedy.com follow and you will find yourself there.

Speaker B: 00:36:46

I can't say enough that this has been an incredible joy and delight to share some laughs and maybe a tear or two with you today here on the Cancer and Comedy show, my friend. We'll be back next week with another.

Speaker A: 00:37:03

Episode of Cancer and Comedy.

Speaker B: 00:37:04

So listen on until next time.

Speaker A: 00:37:08

This is Dr. Brad Miller reminding you that a cheerful heart, heart is good medicine.

Speaker C: 00:37:16

Hey, thanks for joining us on the Cancer and Comedy podcast with Dr. Brad Miller. Make sure you visit our website, cancerandcomedy.com where you can follow the show and get our newsletter. Like what you hear?

Then tell a friend about cancer and Comedy, the show that lifts your spirits with hope and humor that heals. Until next time, keep turning the grim into a grin.